3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
people are starting to question the shark bite story
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
