If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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