She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
