The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
