My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
