Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
