I faked an abortion last night.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize