Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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