Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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