I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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