I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I can't trust your balls anymore.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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