I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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