The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
