I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Randomize