no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
