Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize