Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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