dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
