Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Randomize
