I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
