I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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