Having a random hookup so left but love u
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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