i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
they need to just BURY HIM!
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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