Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
