: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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