why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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