I'm eating all of the evidence.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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