Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
