apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
