Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
