Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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