But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
