woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
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