Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize