i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
