He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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