**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
