Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I CAN MOONWALK!
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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