I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
