You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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