no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
