This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
