walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
