Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
