I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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