Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
