Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
