You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
