it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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