i permit you to call me
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
