i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
