What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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