Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
you traded sex for a burrito?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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